... continued from above

"If you give him a penny for his thoughts, you'd get change."

"If you stand close enough to him, you can hear the oceans."

"It's hard to believe that he beat 1,000,000 other sperm to the egg."

...Read More

William Shakespeare's Sonnet 18 ("Shall I compare thee to a summer's day?") converted into the programming language ActionScript:

var summer:Object = {};
var thee:Object = {};

summer.name = "Summer Day";
...Read More

A man went into the pet shop " I am playing Long John Silver in the local amateur dramatic societies version of Treasure Island and need a parrot to sit on my shoulder" he said.

"I don't have any parrots at the moment , ...Read More

You lose arguments with inanimate objects.

You have to hold onto the lawn to keep from falling off the earth.

Your doctor finds traces of blood in your alcohol stream.

The back of your head keeps getting hit by the ...Read More

A screenwriter comes home to a burned down house. His sobbing wife is standing outside. "What happened, honey?" the man asks.

"Oh, John, it was terrible," she weeps. "I was cooking when the phone rang. It was your ...Read More

Amelia Dimoldenberg talks about Formula 1 drivers teaching her how to drive in her YouTube series Passenger Princess, her mom having a shrine of her and her Chicken Shop Date guests and celebrating the 10th anniversary of ...Read More