ArcaMax

Dear Eric: I have a 10-year relationship unmarried. My girlfriend continues to communicate with her 50-year-old son. Having him determine for her what to do in the relationship. She does not want to communicate with me. She tells me one day she loves me, the next day she does not want to talk.

Should I just end the relationship? I've tried to ...Read more

Dear Eric: Many companies are training their employees to "be friendlier." Now, when I go to pay for my groceries or have bloodwork done at a lab, someone invariably asks me, "so what are you doing the rest of your day?" I find that to be very intrusive from someone I don't know and may never see again. I understand they have been trained so it ...Read more

Dear Eric: I am in my late 30s. I live halfway across the country from my parents, and don't have the best relationship with them. I also have a brother four years younger than me who I have been estranged from for 20 years.

My brother doesn't live with my parents, but he lives in the same city my parents do. If I visit, my parents will tell ...Read more

Dear Eric: My house has become a mess – clutter everywhere – after going through a season of depression. I’m now in counseling, on medication and finally starting to feel better, but the mess feels too overwhelming to tackle. I’m ashamed to ask anyone for help, and I really want to get my home back in shape on my own.

I’d love to be ...Read more

Dear Eric: My son-in-law’s father does not seem to feel the need to trim his nose hair which is quite bushy and hangs out of his nose. Apparently, his wife has asked him to do something about this, but he chooses to ignore her and neither of his sons want to talk to him about it even though it bothers them too.

We host Thanksgiving at our ...Read more

Dear Eric: I recently set boundaries with a friend who would vent to me about another friend of theirs, with whom I'm only barely acquainted.

I asked them to stop processing this other friendship of theirs with me; it felt toxic. I told them I felt sad to spend the little time we have together talking about someone, when we could be talking ...Read more

Dear Eric: We have a neighbor a few doors up who hates us. We don’t really know why, but he doesn’t want us to walk on “his” sidewalk. He considers that harassment by us – just us. We walk up and down the street for our health and pass his house six to 12 times a day. If he sees us through his window, or one of the more than 12 cameras...Read more

Dear Eric: My dilemma is about Christmas cards. I am separated from my husband of 25 years, and while it's mostly amicable, I feel disingenuous including him on the card this year. Our divorce will be final less than a month after Christmas. I am also going back to my maiden name so I thought it might be a good way to announce that as well. We ...Read more

Dear Eric: Over the course of our 26-year marriage I have caught my wife in numerous lies. We started marriage counseling three months ago and during an early session I asked if we could finally be truthful with each other, no more lies. No such luck.

Years ago, her brother suddenly fled and left all his belongings. She put them in storage but ...Read more

Dear Eric: I've been with my boyfriend for 19 years. We have lived together for more than 16 years, but every anniversary comes and goes without a proposal.

I'm wondering if I should ask him next February, even though I feel he should ask me. I've been waiting long enough. I appreciate your advice.

– No Ring

Dear Ring: You don’t have to ...Read more

Dear Eric: Over the last 10 years, the father of my grandchildren has been a severe alcoholic. Two years ago, my daughter left him.

After he had been living on the streets, my daughter asked if he could stay in my basement so that he would get sufficient rest and be able to have the children with him; she knows it's important for the children ...Read more

Dear Eric: My 40-year-old daughter and spouse live in an apartment with their children. Both were raised in clean, tidy homes.

I know they have always paid the rent on time wherever they live. The issue: they're both nasty slobs. They've been in their current apartment less than six months. Their patio is full of trash, unused plant pots, ...Read more

Dear Eric: I have a friend who is a great person. He told me about some experiences that made me extremely worried for his safety. He left town a few years ago for work and he started dating another guy, which I never really approved of because things seemed to move extremely fast and I didn’t like the way he was treated by his ex.

My friend ...Read more

Dear Eric: My husband and I have been married for almost 10 years. He has three siblings, and it seems like he’s the forgotten one. His mom and siblings always put money together and send it for each other’s birthdays. Last year and the year before that, they did it for everyone’s birthday except my husband.

He was very upset about it but...Read more

Dear Eric: My husband “Bob” and I celebrated our 30th anniversary this past spring. He has many wonderful qualities, but he’s also a “lone wolf” who very rarely asks for my input or help.

A few months before he retired, I discovered he’d gone on a hike with a young, pretty coworker.

Many years before, he’d had a two-year affair ...Read more

Dear Eric: My husband of more than 20 years gives me slipper socks with grippy soles. I hate them! We live in a hot climate, so I have little use for them. They filled up my sock drawer and they retraumatize me every time I touch them.

I threw them away and they came back. He gave me five more pairs at Christmas. I kept these for animal first ...Read more

Dear Eric: I completed a yoga teacher training (YTT), which I only shared with family. During the YTT, the studio posted pics on social media, and I was in one pic.

Within hours, Sue, a coworker, sent me a screenshot of the post and asked if it was me. I confirmed. Thereafter, Sue began frantically texting me about how she wanted to attend a ...Read more

Dear Eric: For the last 45 years or so I’ve hosted Thanksgiving for my family. I’ve had as many as 25 people. My sister has two sons, and they’ve always stayed with me. Quite frankly, it’s now an issue. Only one son comes but he now has three sons of his own, ranging from 22 to 8. My sister also stays with me. They come on Wednesday and ...Read more

Dear Eric: I have a huge dilemma literally right across from our home. Our neighbor is a very nice man. Sometimes I do ask him what he’s going to do with all of his stuff in his yard. He just says he’ll keep it. He is a hoarder.

What I see is boxes and boxes stacked all along his driveway, down to his backyard, leaving a very narrow pathway...Read more

Dear Eric: My husband has dementia; it’s getting worse by the month. I am the caregiver. Our daughter calls on her way home from work. Our son calls several times a week. They have been my rock. I lean on them and rely on their excellent advice and strong shoulders.

Our 55th wedding anniversary is several days before Christmas. Because of the...Read more