Life Advice
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Employee Considers Taking New Job Offer
DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently received a job offer from another company that comes with a significantly higher salary than what I'm currently making. The role is in a field I've been wanting to move into for years, and while it's a little intimidating, it genuinely excites me. When I told my current employer about the offer, they surprised me by ...Read more
Drama On The Escalator
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was leaving an underground transit station and making my way to the escalator to go up to the street when I noticed a tall young man gaining rapidly on me from behind.
We have an unwritten rule that you stand on the right side of the escalator if you just want to ride, and move to the left if you want to walk up the moving ...Read more
Friendship or Boundary Issue?
Dear Annie: My husband, "Mark," and I have been married for six years. For the most part, things are good between us, but there's one recurring issue I can't get past. Mark's ex-wife, "Tina," is still very involved in his life -- not in a co-parenting way, since they don't even have kids, but socially. She calls him every few weeks or so, ...Read more
Mother-Daughter Rift Puts Dad In A Tough Spot
DEAR ABBY: My daughter, "Violet," lives about two hours away. She and her mother (my wife) do not get along. Violet was always a rebellious, independent wild child, as well as the source of a lot of family problems. Violet and I also were estranged until we recently reconciled.
Yesterday, she sent me an email inviting me to lunch to celebrate ...Read more
Single File: Bed Gratitude
Her phone call startled me. The distraught woman on the other end spoke in rapid-fire sentences, most of them half-finished. Every word was confused, jumbled. But after some time, it became clear that her husband of 30 years was leaving the marriage. He wanted to live alone. In a way, he had already gone; they hadn't had sex in a year, and the ...Read more

Ask Dating Coach Erika: 'Is it a red flag if they get sexual before we've even met?'
YES!!!
Probably half of the questions I get are, “Is it a red flag if (fill in the blank)?” And in many of these cases, based on whatever the “blank” is, it’s not a red flag. It’s a mere preference. For example, “It is a red flag if he has a roommate at age 32?” Probably not. “Is it a red flag if he texts his mother every day?...Read more

Asking Eric: Husband’s emotional affair remains unresolved and unforgiven
Dear Eric: My husband works for an airline and had an emotional affair with a female coworker. I only found out through less-than-honest means (I went through his phone while he was asleep).
I have started going to long-overdue therapy but am unable to get over the constant paranoia, anxiety and anguish this has caused.
I'm an extremely loyal ...Read more
Weighing The Pros And Cons Of Renting Vs. Owning
DEAR HARRIETTE: I grew up in New York and have been here my entire life. I decided about a year ago that I wanted to move to a new city. I only flirted with the idea at first, but recently, my boss told me that if I'm serious, they could transfer me to the Chicago office. I've taken them up on their offer and will be moving within a few months. ...Read more
Sales Calls Are Ruining Our Vacation
DEAR MISS MANNERS: My wife and I joined a travel timeshare that we both love. The only thing we hate is how they try to upsell you.
After check-in, you are required to go to the concierge desk to get your arm band or parking pass. Once there, the hard sell starts; they try to bribe, encourage or beg you to attend a sales meeting. (They call ...Read more
The Hidden Cause Behind a Loved One's Withdrawal
Dear Annie: Your column is a regular part of our home, and I truly appreciate the compassion and insight you bring to readers' questions. I would like to gently offer another perspective, one that may sometimes be overlooked when people write in about the emotional withdrawal of a spouse, parent or longtime friend.
In some cases, what appears...Read more
Wife's View Of Herself Shrinks After Discovery
DEAR ABBY: About eight months ago, I stumbled on my husband watching online porn. He admitted to habitual use but said it was just a stress reliever and he would stop viewing it. Meanwhile, I am plagued by feelings of not being enough for him, mainly before or during sex but also at random times of the day and night.
I am a small-breasted woman...Read more

Ask Anna: I shut down in long-distance relationships -- how do I stay connected?
Dear Anna,
I’ve been dating my boyfriend for about six months, and we moved in together pretty quickly — it’s been wonderful, and I feel really loved. The challenge is he’s about to relocate for work for most of the year, and I’m scared about how I’ll handle the distance. I have a weird pattern when people aren’t physically in my ...Read more

Asking Eric: Husband kicks wife’s children out of the house
Dear Eric: My wife has three living adult kids from three different fathers – ages 22, 29 and 32. The 32-year-old has a husband and two kids of her own. I allowed all of them to live with us since they couldn’t get along on their own.
Last year, my wife’s fourth adult child died so I inherited her 3-year-old.
We had nine people in our ...Read more
Boy Won't Stop Pulling Neighbor's Flowers
DEAR HARRIETTE: My neighbor's young son has developed a habit of coming into my yard and picking flowers for his mom from my garden, which is right on the border of our two lawns. She always laughs and says how sweet it is when he hands them to her, but I can't help feeling frustrated. I've spent countless hours planting, watering and tending to...Read more
The Engagement Ring Selection Ballet
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I've seen young men with their mothers picking out a ring that the young woman of his choice is supposed to love and wear forever.
What if they picked something she really didn't like?
I would like to propose a new tradition: The proposal is made and accepted, but instead of a ring, the proposer offers a jewel box that ...Read more
Bridging the Gap With Daughters-in-Law
Dear Annie: My husband and I are the proud grandparents of two beautiful granddaughters. "Lila" is 20 months old and the daughter of our son "Michael" and his wife, "Emily." "Sophie" is 10 months old and the daughter of our other son "Daniel" and his wife, "Grace."
We love both girls dearly and feel so fortunate to have them in our lives. But...Read more
Intense, Unrequited Feelings Make It Hard To Move Forward
DEAR ABBY: I'm struggling with something that feels both silly and painful. I've developed intense feelings (maybe even "limerence") for a man I know, and no matter how hard I try, no one else seems to compare. I have tried dating apps, looking at younger guys, older guys, conventionally attractive guys. Nothing clicks. I keep thinking, why can'...Read more

Asking Eric: Longtime professor lectures in casual conversation
Dear Eric: Our next-door neighbor is a longtime university professor who is well known in his field. We have been neighbors for many years, and we all get along well. He lives alone.
An irritating habit of his is to stop by and launch into long-winded stories about some mundane event in his present or past life or to pontificate about a current...Read more
Son And Family Ask To Move In With Mother
DEAR HARRIETTE: My son recently lost his job and asked if he, his wife and their two young children could move back into my home for a few months while they get back on their feet. I love my son and my grandkids dearly and I want to help them, but the idea of having four extra people in my house, especially two energetic children, feels ...Read more
Nothing Convenient About Rudeness
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was at a convenience store, with my arms full of groceries. There were three tall young men standing near the register in a group, and I asked if they were in line.
They said yes and lined up. When I thought they were finished, I placed my items on the counter and moved forward to the credit card reader, accidentally ...Read more
Inside Life Advice
Popular Stories
- Ask Anna: What to do when you've been dating for months but aren't 'official'
- Ask Dating Coach Erika: 'When is the best time for the 'what are we?' question?'
- Ask Anna: How to handle conflict when your partner only wants to text
- Ask Dating Coach Erika: When is it time to take a dating break?
- Ask Dating Coach Erika: 'Is it a red flag if they get sexual before we've even met?'