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Q: I am the daughter of Holocaust survivors who both recently passed. I was brought up in a very conservative home where we went to synagogue every Saturday. We kept kosher and observed all the holidays. As an adult, I have become much less religious but maintained all of the Jewish traditions with my children. Although I maintain celebrating the Jewish holidays, I have become more of an atheist. A question has come up in my family and I seem to be in the minority and am very curious about your opinion. I have always liked the cross symbol. Obviously, I understand its meaning but simply put, I just like its aesthetic. I don’t attach any religious meaning to it. To that end, I was recently traveling and came across a beautiful handcrafted cross. My husband was emphatic that there is no world in which I can wear a cross. He feels that it is extremely inappropriate for any Jewish person (particularly one of my background) to wear a symbol that is indicative of Jesus Christ. My argument is that I like the cross as purely a beautiful design and I don’t attach any religious sentiment to it. Truthfully I don’t really care what people think but I also don’t want to wear anything that may be offensive. I am very curious to hear your thoughts on this topic! – (From N in Melville, NY)

A: Dear cross-loving N. Let’s begin by remembering the difference between a sign and a symbol. A sign is just what it is and nothing more. A symbol is more than it is. A sign just stands for itself while a symbol stands for something beyond itself. A stop sign, for example, is just a sign. It tells you to stop and that’s it. A cross tells you much, much more. A cross stands for a story – the story of Jesus’ crucifixion and resurrection. The cross is the visible instantiation of the Christian story. The cross is the symbol of Christianity. Martin Luther wrote: Crux sola est nostra theologia, "The cross alone is our theology."

The various denominations of Christianity use the cross in different ways to reinforce their version of the passion narrative. The basic types of crosses are the Latin cross with unequal arms and the Greek cross with equal arms but there are numerous other variants. Catholics usually depict the cross with the body of Jesus still nailed to it. This is called a crucifix, and it emphasizes the atoning suffering of Jesus. Protestants almost always depict the cross without a body on it and it represents Jesus’ resurrection and triumph over death. The cross as a symbol says all that. You ask if the cross can mean nothing and that is not possible. Because the cross is a symbol, it will always represent Christianity and the story of Jesus atoning death and resurrection.

Sometimes signs can become symbols. The Star of David was once just an ancient Persian sign but it became a symbol for the Jewish people and so is on the Israeli flag. The swastika was also an ancient sign that was transformed into a symbol of Nazism. Even the cross was just a sign found in ancient Persian and Egyptian tombs and structures. However, once a sign turns into a symbol of faith it no longer is just an ancient shape. It is an eternal symbol of the story of that faith.

If you were to wear a cross it would wordlessly convey the mistaken impression that you are a Christian, just like Christians wearing stars of David would be sending a message that they are Jewish. So your husband was right. Do not allow your infatuation with the cross to become an unintended misrepresentation of your true identity.

Let me say a word or two of agreement with your love of the cross which I also share. I do not love the cross as a symbol of my spiritual identity, but I love it as the most perfect religious symbol in the world. Its utter simplicity reveals a complex story with just two lines: one horizontal and one vertical. Its vertical line links heaven and earth just like Christians believe Jesus linked heaven and earth. Its horizontal line links all the people of the earth as Christianity seeks to bring the Gospel in evangelical joy to every part of the earth. Neither the star of David in Judaism or the star and crescent of Islam or the om of Hinduism or the wheel of Dharma of Buddhism are such a perfect symbol. The cross is perfect. You are right to admire it, but you can admire it as a perfect stranger.

(Send ALL QUESTIONS AND COMMENTS to The God Squad via email at godsquadquestion@aol.com. Rabbi Gellman is the author of several books, including “Religion for Dummies,” co-written with Fr. Tom Hartman. Also, the new God Squad podcast is now available.)

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