We Listed Our Home -- Now the Kids Want to Buy It
Dear Monty: We listed our house a week ago, and our children have come to us, expressing that they don't want us to sell the house where they grew up. They want to move in with us and help pay for it or buy it. How can we get out of our contract? And how to handle the kids?
Monty's Answer: Your agent will tell you the listing agreement is binding. Your children are offering a heartfelt solution. Both may be wrong. This situation requires untangling contractual obligations from family emotions, two areas where conventional wisdom can fail both families and agents.
Your Contract Exit Options: Most agents are not permitted to cancel listings without broker approval. Review your contract immediately for termination clauses, cancellation windows and early exit fees. Some contracts allow for cancellation within 24-72 hours, while others require notice periods or reimbursement of marketing costs.
Option 1: Request mutual agreement. Contact your agent, explain the family situation and request release. Many agents agree that when no offers exist, they prefer goodwill over legal disputes. Get any agreement in writing. If your agent refuses, question why they'd force an unmotivated seller to continue.
Option 2: Negotiate a pause. Propose suspending the listing for 30-60 days while you evaluate the arrangement. This action tests your children's commitment without terminating the agreement. A reasonable agent should accommodate this; forcing showings when sellers are reconsidering creates poor outcomes for everyone.
Option 3: Examine agent performance. If your children are financially capable, your home can accommodate them comfortably, and the broker is resisting, then consider this option. Inadequate marketing, poor communication or misrepresentation can constitute grounds for termination.
Option 4: Wait it out. Most listing agreements run 90-180 days. You're not obligated to accept offers unless they meet your exact terms. If necessary, let the listing contract expire.
The Family Conversation: Reality Before Emotion -- Emotional attachment to childhood homes rarely translates into sustainable financial arrangements. Before canceling your listing, require specifics. Can they actually afford this? Mortgage payments, property taxes, insurance, maintenance and utilities add up quickly. Homeowners typically spend 1-2% of home value annually on maintenance alone. Require your children to demonstrate solid financial ability. Vague promises don't pay mortgages.
How will multi-generational living work? Who makes household decisions? What happens when someone loses a job, wants to move, or relationships strain? Draft a written agreement specifying financial contributions, responsibilities and conditions under which you'll resume the sale.
Test Before Committing: If it makes sense, take your home off the market, let the kids move in and have them contribute their proposed payments. This test may help determine whether the arrangement is workable. You can always relist the house. You may all discover that childhood memories do not translate into compatible adult living situations if the idea of buying the house isn't feasible.
Making Your Decision: The question isn't whether you can exit the listing -- you likely can. The question is whether you should. Your children's proposal deserves evaluation beyond sentimentality, and your agent's contract deserves scrutiny beyond their assurances that it's binding.
Separate emotion from financial reality. Get facts, set clear expectations, then decide. The worst outcome isn't staying or selling, it's making either decision based on guilt, nostalgia or contractual intimidation rather than informed choice.
Richard Montgomery is a syndicated columnist, published author, retired real estate executive, serial entrepreneur and the founder of DearMonty.com and PropBox, Inc. He provides consumers with options to real estate issues. Follow him on Twitter (X) @montgomRM or DearMonty.com.
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