Life Advice
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Game Show Participation Could Cost Job
DEAR HARRIETTE: I recently got cast on a game show that I've watched for years and I've always wanted to be on! This is a dream come true and very exciting; however, filming it takes about 45 days. I don't have enough vacation time from my job, so if I go on the show, I would have to quit my job. I didn't think that I would get this far in the ...Read more
Sometimes Incredulity Is The Best Response
DEAR MISS MANNERS: When I meet new people and tell them where I earned my bachelor's degree and what my plans for the future are, I frequently get comments and questions such as, "Wow, you must be really smart," or "Did you do well on the MCAT?" or "What was your GPA?"
Having been raised to consider this information personal, I am unsure how to...Read more
Life's Messy Moments Count the Most
Dear Annie: Every December, my life starts to feel like one of those "year in review" videos -- only mine looks more like the blooper reel.
Back in January, I sat at my kitchen table with a brand-new planner, a cinnamon latte and all the determination in the world. I even wrote, "This Is Jenna's Year" in big blue letters on the first page. I ...Read more
Friend's Comments Have Fallen Short of Friendly
DEAR ABBY: I am a very overweight woman, but down 50 pounds from my top weight and continuing at a consistent, but slow, rate to lose. My A1C is now down to pre-diabetic, so I know my efforts are making a difference. I recently had a terrible bout of sciatica and pain in an arthritic knee, which kept me from some anticipated travel.
A good (so ...Read more
Ask Dating Coach Erika: What if I can't tell what they look like in their profile?
As someone who views hundreds or maybe even thousands of dating profiles per week, let’s just say that I’ve seen a lot of dating profile photos. Too many dating profile photos. So, I know a thing or two about a good photo. I know even more about a bad picture ... and how one seemingly deceptive photo can turn into a left swipe faster than ...Read more
Asking Eric: New friend group brings up old insecurities
Dear Eric: After 38 years of military and Department of Defense service, I retired and moved to my current home eight years ago (in a town I've never lived in before). I became friends with a woman two years ago and she introduced me to her larger circle of friends (about 19 women). Since then, I've become close with her and her best friend and ...Read more
Husband Refuses To Help With Basic Tasks
DEAR HARRIETTE: My husband and I got into a fight, and I feel like it revealed a lot about what he thinks about me. For context, I was going on a work trip for two days, and I asked my husband if he could take care of the dog and be there when the handyman came over to fix our bathroom sink. I had already scheduled the time when the handyman was...Read more
Let's Presume Good Intentions -- Most Of The Time
DEAR MISS MANNERS: When did people become so insecure that they take offense at pretty much everything?
I've noticed a huge shift. Compliments given by strangers are now considered an insult or an attack against their feelings. A mom is insulted, a woman with a pretty hairstyle is offended, someone with a nice outfit is annoyed. "You look nice ...Read more
Wife's Memory Is Fading Fast
Dear Annie: I think my partner is slipping away from me, and I do not know how to reach for her without breaking both our hearts.
My wife, "Laura," is 68. We have been together for 40 years. She has always been the organized one. When the kids were young, she could tell you where every permission slip, tax form and missing sock lived in our ...Read more
Demands Of Career Have Put A Damper On Dreams
DEAR ABBY: I am in my early 30s and happy in certain aspects of my life: I recently moved to a house and married a man I love very much. I have friends, hobbies and dreams. One of these dreams is to be a novelist, although I do marketing for a tech company right now.
This brings me to my problem: I have been feeling depressed by my job. Working...Read more
Asking Eric: Couple has everything but still makes wedding registry
Dear Eric: A friend is planning his second marriage. It will be his fiancée’s third. Both are in their mid-to-late 60s, have owned their single-family homes for many years, and have reasonably well-paying jobs.
They are planning a wedding shower and have registered for gifts, including expensive kitchen equipment and utensils, china, ...Read more
Breaking Free From My Phone
Dear Annie: I am starting to feel like my whole life is lived through a screen, and I am ashamed to admit how much control my phone seems to have over me.
I am 42 and married, with two kids in middle school. On paper, things are fine. In reality, I spend more time scrolling than actually living my life. I pick up my phone "just to check one ...Read more
Jilted Wife Blames Herself For Marriage's Collapse
DEAR ABBY: My ex-husband and I were best friends. We shared everything -- dreams, laughs and struggles. I was convinced we'd grow old together. When he proposed, I said yes without hesitation. We had plans to start a family, but he asked me to wait until we purchased a home. I waited five years, trusting that the dream we had built together was ...Read more
Asking Eric: Parents kept up relationship with son’s ex after infidelity
Dear Eric: About 14 years ago our son was seriously dating a woman whom both my wife and I really adored. We both thought she would be a great wife and daughter-in-law.
She became the daughter we always wanted to have.
Then the unspeakable happened. She cheated on him. They broke up, yet remained friends, but she claimed she had adopted us as ...Read more
Expectations Unclear In Relationship
DEAR HARRIETTE: I don't feel secure in my current relationship. I feel like the guy I have been seeing is going to ghost when it takes him a while to respond, even if things seem fine on the surface. We have this odd dynamic where I am always excited about anything he suggests for a date, but whenever I try to initiate the plans, he has a weird ...Read more
'happy Anniversary, And/Or Sorry About Your Marriage'
DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was in my friend's wedding a year ago, and now her anniversary is coming up. However, in the last six months, it does not seem like the marriage is going well, and I'm honestly not sure if the couple is still together.
This leads me to wonder whether I should even mention her anniversary on the day. I think texting "Happy ...Read more
Longing to Connect With a Quiet Son
Dear Annie: My son lives at home, but he has no interest in talking to me. He doesn't eat meals with me and my husband. He just stays in his room and comes downstairs to cook his own food, which is invariably a pan-fried sandwich, possibly with air-fried breaded chicken, followed by crisps and a packet of biscuits. It's a shame. I'd love to have...Read more
Husband Makes a Poor Choice with Wife's Health
DEAR ABBY: Two years ago, my husband was told that our adult child's partner had tested positive for COVID two days before we were scheduled to visit them. My husband -- a forever Good Time Charlie -- decided not to inform me. Neither of us at that point had contracted COVID. We had taken every precaution we could to avoid it.
I have MS, which ...Read more
Asking Eric: Adult son’s belongings fill up parents’ house
Dear Eric: One of my husband's son's is going through an ongoing divorce, many years.
A few years ago, he started storing equipment, tools, bikes, and more in our garage, attic, shed and basement. Our garage is packed to the ceiling, and we cannot use it for many of our own things. We felt badly for him when he first told us of his "plight", ...Read more
Classmate Creates One-Sided Rivalry
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm struggling with this weird competitive energy between me and one of my classmates. On the surface, we're friendly -- we study together, share notes, even joke about motivating each other. But lately, it feels like our "friendly competition" is not so friendly anymore. If I do well on an assignment, they make little comments ...Read more
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