ArcaMax

DEAR MISS MANNERS: We are frequent cruisers. That means we share spaces such as elevators, dining rooms, theaters, lounges, etc., with fellow cruisers we don't know. We have always had pleasant times interacting with others.

On our most recent cruise, we encountered an older couple -- sometimes in the elevators, sometimes in our top-tier lounge...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: We invited over some of my partner's friends who all have young children. Our children are grown, but we adore kids.

We understand that kids make messes. We childproofed by moving breakable objects out of reach. We brought out a selection of toys for them to play with. We offered cookies and crackers, and fully expected to ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband and I dine out often. I use my napkin and have good manners, but even so, there are times that I apparently get small particles of food on my face.

When this happens, my husband thinks it's fun to play "food-on-your-face charades." He will point to his own face to let me know that there is a problem, then when I ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband and I regularly host events at our home for groups from five to 20 people. We all have a wonderful time and enjoy one another's company.

However, there is one guest who always makes an offhand "joke" about something in our home or the way I run my kitchen. Things like, "This is the dumbest dish I've ever seen," or ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: There's a woman I've known for more than 40 years. We were close when our children were young, but we have not been in regular contact for many years. I still care a lot about her, and believe the feeling is reciprocated.

She's become more isolated by health challenges over the last couple of years, and my invitations to meet...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My cousin, with whom my husband and I are very close, is getting married. Unfortunately, there are a few problems.

The initial issues included our limited finances, transportation troubles, the date of the event (a Thursday night) and the wedding's no-children-allowed rule. With the help of my parents, most of those issues ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My husband and I bought our current home about four years ago, although the house itself is about 20 years old. The backyard is surrounded by a standard wooden fence.

The condition of the wood suggests the fence has been there nearly as long as the house, and we think it desperately needs to be replaced. Two of our neighbors ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: At a restaurant, if my food is served by someone other than my waiter and I need to request an additional or missing item (e.g., extra sauce or sour cream), do I make that request to the person who served the food? Or do I wait for the waiter to come over and ask if everything is OK?

Does it even matter? Sometimes the waiter ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am of Asian descent and have lived in the U.S. for about two-thirds of my life. My pet peeve is when people ask me where I am from. I politely reply with the name of my home state (in the U.S.).

Yes, I still have an accent.

My kids were born in the U.S. and have grown up here; they have no accents and no ties to Asia. And ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When I went to the DMV to get a temporary tag, I noticed that every person in line -- about 25 people, from young to middle-aged -- was wearing their pajamas and flip-flops. They all looked like they had just rolled out of bed.

They were also all on their phones, oblivious to others. I felt like I was in their bedrooms or ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: You have been influential in my decision to take up a new hobby this year: mailing handwritten letters to friends and family for a variety of occasions. This includes handwritten thank-you cards instead of my usual texts of gratitude upon receiving a gift when the giver is not present.

But I got myself into a funny conundrum....Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: When flying, I often find myself subjected to the unintentional elbow jabs of my seatmate.

I always make a conscious effort to remain within the boundaries of my seat, carefully avoiding encroaching on anyone else's space. However, on my last flight, I was elbowed repeatedly while attempting to sleep. (For the record, I have ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am a college student who lives in the dormitories on campus. The hallways are average-sized -- about 5 feet wide -- and are never crowded, though residents often have conversations in the hall.

Often, two or more people will be leaning on opposite walls, making it impossible to go around the conversation. I always walk ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I live in a four-family apartment building in a middle-class neighborhood. All of the tenants are very nice people, but the landlord is notoriously unresponsive.

I live on the second floor, and the young lady in the apartment next door to me has everything delivered to her. We share a common front stairway.

The other day, a ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I'm a single woman who is frequently asked about my plans for marriage. The individuals making these inquiries have no business asking this question, let alone hearing the answer.

I typically smile and change the subject without answering their question. A few times, when particularly startled, I have responded with, "I beg ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: The culture of my academic field is very casual. I'm interviewing for professorships at several places, and the faculty committees in the interviews -- all "doctors" by title -- invite me to call them by their first names.

Having just completed my Ph.D., I'd like to ask them to recognize this, at least for the period of the ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I am expecting my second daughter in March. Our families are both looking forward to having a baby shower for two main reasons: This will be the first shower we've had, because we lived too far away last time, and also because I've had two miscarriages prior to this pregnancy.

Obviously both sides of the family are very ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I have a longtime friend who has a habit of waiting until the last minute to confirm plans or even make them.

One Sunday morning, she asked me if I would like to come over and go for a walk sometime that week and then stay for dinner. I said, "Does Wednesday work for you? It looks like the weather will be OK that day."

On ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: I was leaving an underground transit station and making my way to the escalator to go up to the street when I noticed a tall young man gaining rapidly on me from behind.

We have an unwritten rule that you stand on the right side of the escalator if you just want to ride, and move to the left if you want to walk up the moving ...Read more

DEAR MISS MANNERS: My wife and I joined a travel timeshare that we both love. The only thing we hate is how they try to upsell you.

After check-in, you are required to go to the concierge desk to get your arm band or parking pass. Once there, the hard sell starts; they try to bribe, encourage or beg you to attend a sales meeting. (They call ...Read more